Academic Discussion
·Animal Testing
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Estimated TOEFL · Writing
Key Takeaway
The response shows an attempt to engage with the topic of animal testing but suffers from unclear arguments and vague examples.
Lack of clarity and coherenceCritical
“For decades scientists did their study on animal which results in their suffering or they died because of that many people were offended and they also protested against this it,Moreover,in this era with the advancement of artifical intelligence we have observed that alot of new lab reserch could be done therefore, reserchers do not need to sacrifise animal for there work”
Fix·For decades, scientists have conducted studies on animals, often resulting in their suffering or death, which has led to public protests. However, with advancements in artificial intelligence, many new laboratory experiments can now be conducted without the need for animal sacrifice.
Vague exampleModerate
“For Instance, Luca a famous dog was sent to space before human and she never came back because of that many people are still upset as that dog was use for the testing in rocket to send in space”
Fix·For instance, Laika, a famous dog, was sent to space in 1957 as part of a Soviet mission. She did not survive the journey, which sparked public outrage and highlighted the ethical issues of using animals in such experiments.
“modern technology will give far better results and will be more ethical.”
This shows awareness of technological advancements, which is relevant to the topic and adds depth to the argument.
“I would strongly emphasize that its our moral duty to prevent such anaimal testing”
Expressing a moral viewpoint strengthens the argument by appealing to ethical considerations, which is persuasive in discussions about animal rights.
“For decades scientists did their study on animal which results in their suffering”
Providing historical context helps to frame the issue and shows understanding of the long-standing nature of the debate.
Vocabulary & Flow
Use more varied linking words to improve the flow and coherence of the argument.
Grammar Corrections
1 items foundSpelling error
Suggested Academic Phrases
Improvement Roadmap
Develop examples with more detail and context.
Now: For Instance, Luca a famous dog was sent to space before human and she never came back
Try: For instance, Laika, a dog sent to space by the Soviet Union in 1957, did not survive the mission, highlighting the ethical issues of animal testing in space exploration.
Providing well-developed examples can significantly enhance the persuasiveness of the argument.Correct spelling errors to improve clarity.
Where: introduction
Try: Change 'beleive' to 'believe'.
Use varied linking words to enhance coherence.
Try: Instead of 'Moreover', try 'Additionally' or 'Furthermore'.