Write an Email
·Your new neighbor has been playing loud music late at night for the past week. This has been affecting your sleep and ability to concentrate on your work. You want to address this issue politely.
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Email Writing Guide
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Estimated TOEFL · Writing
Key Takeaway
The email is polite and addresses all required points effectively.
Awkward phrasingModerate
“I am writing to firstly ,welcome you into the neighbourhood and secondly, ask you to kindly maintain a lower level of noise in the evenings.”
Fix·I am writing to welcome you to the neighborhood and to kindly ask if you could keep the noise level down in the evenings.
Lack of clarity in time suggestionModerate
“Kindly play your tunes after 7:00 pm as then it wont disturb the rest of my infant and I can also get some sleep.”
Fix·Could you please play your music after 7:00 pm? This would help ensure my infant can rest, and I can also get some sleep.
“I am your next door neighbour from apartment 305.”
This establishes the writer's identity and relationship to the recipient, which is crucial for context and politeness in communication.
“I am writing to firstly, welcome you into the neighbourhood and secondly, ask you to kindly maintain a lower level of noise in the evenings.”
The writer balances a welcoming gesture with a polite request, which helps maintain a positive relationship while addressing the issue.
“Kindly play your tunes after 7:00 pm as then it wont disturb the rest of my infant and I can also get some sleep.”
Providing a specific time for the neighbor to play music shows consideration for both parties' needs and offers a practical solution.
Vocabulary & Flow
Consider using more varied transitional phrases to enhance the flow of the email.
Grammar Corrections
1 items foundThe phrase 'a lot' should be two words.
Email Structure
The greeting is formal and appropriate for the context.
“Dear Sir in apartment 304 I am your next door neighbour from apartment 305. I am writing to firstly ,welcome you into the neighbourhood and secondly, ask you to kindly maintain a lower level of noise in the evenings. I am a mother of a small 5 month old child and for the past few days it has been extremely difficult to put my daughter to sleep as there is alot of loud music being played in your apartment and the sound carries over very clearly. Kindly play your tunes after 7”
The opening paragraph effectively introduces the writer and sets the context for the email.
The body content addresses all the requirements, providing a clear description of the issue and a reasonable solution.
The closing paragraph invites future interaction and maintains a positive tone.
Your email is missing a proper sign-off. End with "Sincerely," "Best regards," or "Thank you," followed by your name.
Suggested Academic Phrases
Improvement Roadmap
Enhance clarity and politeness in requests.
Now: Kindly play your tunes after 7:00 pm as then it wont disturb the rest of my infant and I can also get some sleep.
Try: Could you please play your music after 7:00 pm? This would help ensure my infant can rest, and I can also get some sleep.
Improving clarity and politeness can enhance the effectiveness of your communication.Correct minor grammatical errors.
Where: body
Try: there is a lot of loud music
Use varied transitional phrases to improve flow.
Try: Consider using phrases like 'in addition' or 'furthermore' to enhance the flow of your writing.