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Write an Email

·

You ordered a birthday gift for your sister that was marked as delivered, but you never received the package. The delivery photo shows an unfamiliar doorstep. You need to resolve this with customer service.

78 words
Submitted: Apr 10, 2026, 07:50 AM

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Estimated TOEFL · Writing

19/ 30
Intermediate
0152230
Rubric3.0/5

Key Takeaway

The email includes a greeting and a closing, which are positive aspects of social conventions.

Lack of specific order detailsCritical

I am writing to inquire about gift.

Fix·I am writing to inquire about my order #12345, a birthday gift for my sister.

Unclear request for assistanceModerate

I would greatly appreciate it if you could check delivery tetails.

Fix·Could you please verify the delivery address and provide a solution, such as a refund or reshipment?

Polite tone

I hope this email finds you well.

This establishes a courteous and professional tone, which is important for effective communication in formal emails.

Clear identification

My name is Ryuya Inoue.

Providing a clear identification helps the support team quickly recognize the sender, which is crucial for efficient customer service interactions.

Expression of gratitude

Thank you for your time and consideration.

Expressing gratitude is a positive social convention that can encourage a helpful response from the recipient.

Vocabulary & Flow

Repetitive Words
appreciate2x
valuegrateful for

Grammar Corrections

1 items found
I don't have receive yet.I have not received it yet.

Incorrect verb form and tense.

Email Structure

Greeting

The greeting is appropriate for a formal email.

Dear support team. I hope this email finds you well. My name is Ryuya Inoue. I am writing to inquire about gift. I recently ordered a birthday gift for my sister,even though I don

Opening Paragraph

The opening provides a polite introduction but lacks specific context about the issue.

Body Content

The body lacks detailed information about the misdelivery and a clear request for resolution.

Missing: Describe why you believe this is a misdelivery.Missing: Request a refund or reshipment.
Closing Paragraph

The closing expresses gratitude but could include a more explicit call to action.

Sign-off

The sign-off is polite and appropriate for a formal email.

Best regards

Suggested Academic Phrases

I would appreciate your prompt attention to this matter.The delivery photo shows an unfamiliar doorstep, indicating a misdelivery.

Improvement Roadmap

High Impact

Include specific order details and a clear request for resolution.

Now: I am writing to inquire about gift.

Try: I am writing to inquire about my order #12345, a birthday gift for my sister. The delivery photo shows an unfamiliar doorstep, indicating a misdelivery. Could you please verify the delivery address and provide a solution, such as a refund or reshipment?

Providing detailed information and a clear request will significantly enhance the email's effectiveness and completeness.
Quick Wins

Correct grammatical errors for clarity.

Where: body

Try: I have not received it yet.

Polish

Use linking words to improve coherence.

Try: However, the delivery photo shows an unfamiliar doorstep, therefore I believe it was misdelivered.