Write an Email
·A local environmental organization is offering summer internships. You are passionate about environmental conservation and want to apply. You need to write an initial email to express your interest and ask about the application process.
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Email Writing Guide
Professional tone and structure for the Write an Email task
TOEFL Writing Templates
Effective templates and phrases for TOEFL writing
Common Grammar Mistakes
Top grammar errors that hurt your TOEFL score
Estimated TOEFL · Writing
Key Takeaway
The email shows a clear interest in the internship and addresses the requirements, but it suffers from limited elaboration and frequent grammatical errors.
Lack of elaborationModerate
“I like environment and I want to learn more about environment because it is very important.”
Fix·I am passionate about environmental conservation and eager to deepen my understanding of this vital field.
Grammar and clarityModerate
“Because of this, I think this internship is good for me.”
Fix·Therefore, I believe this internship would be an excellent opportunity for me to gain practical experience.
“I am very interested in environmental conservation”
Clearly states the applicant's passion, which is crucial for engaging the reader and demonstrating motivation.
“I am taking some environmental classes in school and I also joined a school club about nature.”
Provides specific examples of relevant experience, which helps establish the applicant's background and suitability for the internship.
“I would like to know what responsibilities interns do in your organization.”
Shows proactive interest in understanding the role, which can indicate a serious commitment to the internship.
Vocabulary & Flow
Use a wider range of linking words to improve coherence and flow.
Grammar Corrections
1 items foundMissing article 'the' before a singular noun
Email Structure
Your email is missing a proper greeting. Start with "Dear [Name]," or "Hello," to establish a professional tone.
The purpose is clear, but more context about personal motivation could enhance engagement.
All requirements are addressed, but more detail and clarity would strengthen the application.
The closing could be improved by explicitly thanking the recipient for their time and consideration.
Your email is missing a proper sign-off. End with "Sincerely," "Best regards," or "Thank you," followed by your name.
Suggested Academic Phrases
Improvement Roadmap
Expand on your experiences and motivations to provide a more compelling narrative.
Now: I am taking some environmental classes in school and I also joined a school club about nature.
Try: I have taken several courses in environmental science, which have equipped me with a strong understanding of ecological principles. Additionally, my active participation in the school's nature club has allowed me to engage in various conservation projects.
Improves content and elaboration, potentially increasing the score by 1 point.Use articles correctly to improve grammatical accuracy.
Where: opening
Try: I like the environment and want to learn more about it because it is very important.
Include a formal sign-off to enhance professionalism.
Try: Thank you for considering my application. I look forward to the opportunity to contribute to your organization. Sincerely, Alex